Sorrowful Raven
by chelsea1492
Summary: Raven hates BeastBoy because he is so obsessed with Terra. She is dead and why can't he get over it? Lots and Lots of Terra bashing. BBXRea romance. StarfireXRobin. Very good ending. Please Read and Review?
1. Raven's Sorrow

-1Chapter 1: Raven's Sorrow

Raven sat alone in her room, reading a book. Outside, the November weather was raging in a storm. She loved storms. Well, normally she did. Right now, she couldn't care less about them. She wasn't even really reading, her eyes were going over the words, but she was taking none of it in. She just kept thinking about _her_ and_ him. _Why on earth did he like her? Why was he all upset about her death… or whatever happened to her. Couldn't he see what she had done to him? Care? Not really. Raven sighed and pushed her depression back into her head. There was no point in being upset, all she would do was upset every one else, and they didn't deserve that. She set her book under her pillow and decided to go to the common room.

She walked in and flopped down on a seat, draping her legs over the arm and covering them with her cape.

"Hey Raven, want some green tea in? Im boiling the kettle right now anyway," Robin's voice floated in from the kitchen.

"Yeah, okay I guess," Raven answered, watching Cyborg play a shoot out game on his new games console. Starfire was sitting up at the dinning table, looking through a catalogue.

"Oh Raven! You have come to sit with us! Would you care to view some new outfits with me?" She asked in her usual, happy and excited voice. The sound vaguely irritated Raven, but Starfire was her friend, so she put up with it.

"No thanks Starfire, Im just going to sit here and chill for a while," she answered, monotone.

Robin walked in and handed her a steaming hot mug of green tea.

"Here you go, watch out, the cup's kinda hot," He warned, sitting up at the table across from Starfire.

"No! No! Yes! Aha!" Cyborg was muttering to himself, his huge hands twisting and turning with the control pad in his hands as he steered through the levels, gaining point after point.

"Has any one seen BeastBoy today?" Robin asked, casting his eyes over the group.

"No," Cyborg said quickly, not even glancing from the T.V screen.

"He hasn't graced me with his presence at all today. I fear he is still upset after what happened to Terra," Starfire said, her large green eyes filled with concern.

"What about you Raven?" Robin enquired, gazing at her over the rim of her cup, which she was holding up to her mouth.

"Why would I have? I've been up in my room all day," Raven said quietly, hating BeastBoy silently.

"Oh okay…" Robin trailed off. There was total silence apart from Cyborg's non-stop muttering and the bangs of his game. Raven sipped her tea quietly and tried to empty her mind. It was hard, but eventually she managed to achieve total blankness apart from her chanting Aserath Metreos Zinthos in her mind. Then, BeastBoy waked in. He was soaked through to the skin and looked as if he had been crying. His normally perked ears were drooped and his eyes cast downwards. No one really knew what to say. He walked over to the couch beside Raven's chair and sat down, his head in his hands.

"I still miss her you guys…" He said, not sounding himself at all.

"Well, usually when a loved one dies, it's hard to move on…" Robin began comforting BeastBoy. Raven's mind was going on overdrive. _loved one…. He LOVED her. Yes, like he'll never love me… _Raven stood up suddenly.

"Look Im really tiered, Im gonna turn in for the night!" Raven gushed, pulling her hood up to cover her eyes, which were filling up steadily.

"Good Night Friend Raven! I hope your dreams will be filled with joyous events!" Starfire said happily.

"Night," Grunted Cyborg.

"Night Raven," robin said, not looking away from BeastBoy, who said nothing. Raven took off down the corridor to her room with great strides. Once she was in her room, she slid down to the carpet, her back against her door, and sobbed. She pulled her knees up to her chest and rested her fore head on her knees, tears flowing freely down her cheeks. If only the idiot would notice how much he was killing her. She knew that her hiding her feelings wouldn't help. Her feelings… She glanced up to see minor explosions happening around the room. She took a deep breath and tried to control herself. She managed to tame herself so that the was only a vague crackling of black power in the room. She walked over to her bed and fell down onto it. She was still upset, but she was trying to push it down to the back of her mind.


	2. Time to Give Up

-1Chapter 2: Time to give up

The next few weeks were passing in a whirl of sadness for Raven. She cried almost ever night. She got upset every time she saw BeastBoy and she would feel tears fall down her face. He saw a few times, but said nothing. He just ignored her. Raven felt so ill. She kept making things implode. Until one day she decided to give up. What was the point in mourning over something she was never going to get. BeastBoy was in love with Terra and Terra only. Even though she was gone now, he was still in love with her memory.

December was apon them. Vicious winds ripped through T-tower, making them all freezing. Starfire, who was learning about Christmas, was overjoyed and could be heard singing Christmas carols while putting tinsel up everywhere she could reach. She had tried to get into Raven's room, but Raven refused to let her decorate the room. Raven wandered out of her room one morning, yawning and pulling her hood up, when she bumped into Cyborg.

"Good morning' Raven!" He said cheerily.

"Hey," Raven said in her monotonous voice.

"This is gonna sound weird, but is there anything wrong? You sound even more depressed than usual. Can I help?" He asked, trying to peer under her hood.

"There's nothing wrong. Thanks for your concern though," Raven answered, bowing her head and walking past him toward the kitchen. She was ready to walk in when she saw BeastBoy in there. _Oh god, he's probably still upset about Terra the Terrible… _Raven thought. She walked in, avoiding eye contact with him.

"Hey Raven!" He said cheerfully. Raven, luckily, had her back to him, so he didn't see the surprised look on her face. He was actually happy.

"Hello," She said blankly, pouring out a bowl of cereal for herself.

"How are you?" he asked, grinning.

"Spiffing," She replied, sarcasm dripping from her voice. She picked up her Cornflakes and a small carton of milk and left the kitchen, unable to remain in the same room as him. She contemplated hitting him, but that would only tear the Titans apart. She no longer felt anything but hate for him. She walked down the corridor and instead of going to her room, she went to another room, it was just a store cupboard, but she knew that no-one would think of looking here for her. She began eating her Cornflakes, pulling a book out of her robes and flicking to her page.

"Raven? RAVEN?" Robin, Cyborg, Starfire and BeastBoy had all been shouting her name for about a hour now. They couldn't find her. She was happy alone, she could think about anything she wanted without being interrupted. She was right now, thinking of them. She loved her friends. Starfire was a little on the shrill, glompy, annoying side, but she loved her as a true friend. She hated going to the mall with her, but done it to make her happy. When Starfire was sad, Raven felt guilty and sad herself. Star was just such a loveable, naive person that she couldn't bring herself to shout at her or make her upset. Robin… Robin was a laugh and a good leader. He and her had always had a kind of connection. Not in the romantic way, in a Twin brother way. Robin just wasn't Raven's type. He somehow always knew the right things to say and when to say them. He also respected her privacy. She could shout at Robin, but she knew he would never take anything to heart, because he knew that inside, Raven just wanted to have space. Cyborg was great. Raven really liked him. He was like a kind of big brother to them all. He was obsessed with cars, and flirted with random girls that he found attractive. He was protective and he would stick up for her in the blink of an eye. He wasn't her type either. BeastBoy _was_ a good friend. Raven _had _thought he was comical, even if she never showed it. She thought he was so cute, especially when he was messing up. He was really nice too, he would have made sure she was okay, but the Terra marched in and everything blew up her face. He fell head over heels in love with her. What for? Well, she was beautiful, Raven was going to give her than. She had nothing on Terra in the looks department. Terra had befriended them, betrayed them, and then taken her life to show how devoted she was to them. Raven felt ill. Terra had known. She had caught Raven gazing absently at BeastBoy. She had caught her give a little smile when he gave a really corny joke and laughed himself stupid at it. Terra had known all along, so why, if she was so devoted, do this to her? She shouldn't have stolen BeastBoy from her. _Thanks Terra, thanks a lot… _Raven muttered. She stood up, her back and legs stiff from sitting in the same position fro hours on end. She walked out of the closet and walked towards an open window. She jumped out, but not fast enough. Robin had caught a glimpse of her cape as she flew up wards. He said nothing. He knew what was wrong with her, but it was her business. A battle raged inside him. He cared about Raven, but he respected her privacy. He didn't know how she now felt… he would have to talk to her…


	3. A chat With Robin

-1Chapter 3: A Chat with Robin

Raven flew over houses and buildings, until she found the perfect place to sit. She sat on top of a skyscraper. The sun was beginning to set. She swung her legs over the side and peered down. It was about ninety storeys high. The cars below were just tiny pinpricks of colour on the grey street. She fell back and lay there, watching the first of the stars come out. She closed her eyes…  
"Hey Raven," Came a voice above her. Her eyes snapped open and she saw Robin's face above her.  
"What are you doing here? How did you get here? How did you know?" Raven stammered.  
"Well, Im here to see if your okay, I used an elevator and I knew because I watched you fly here." He replied, counting her questions off on his fingers. "Look Raven, I'm worried about you,"  
"Well, don't be, Im fine." She said, pulling her hood further down over her eyes.  
"So it seems. Raven, it's not the same now. What is the matter?" Robin asked, his stare piercing hers. Suddenly Raven felt like she could handle no more.  
"It's HIM!" She cried, putting her hands up to her face. "That little green twerp! I hate him!"  
"Why?" Robin asked gently.  
"Because… Well, actually I hate two people. That blonde bimbo Terra! She knew Robin! She knew!" She sobbed.  
"Knew… that you were in love with BeastBoy." He said, comprehension dawning.  
"Yes… were and she STILL led him on. Then betrayed us! Then she said she was loyal to us! Well, loyal to you lot maybe, but if she was a true friend, she wouldn't have let him break my heart. It wasn't his fault, I didn't show him I loved him! He knew that I was upset after Terra died, and he didn't care! I don't blame him…" she trailed off.  
"Right Raven. You're like one of my best friends, and friends don't back out on friends. You're right, what Terra done was mean. I know she knew. I kinda did too. I saw the way you blushed when he was trying to make you dance at his Birthday party. I don't think he did though. Also, about him not caring, well, I don't have a clue because he wouldn't talk to us after that thing with Terra happened. Im sorry that I said 'loved one' that night. I knew I had said something hurtful to make you fly up like that. I just didn't realise." Robin put a hand on Raven's back.  
"It's okay. I guess we were just never meant to be. I think maybe we should just be friends then…" Raven said, fighting back tears.  
"It's up to you, but, if you ever need to talk, I'm here for you. Just come see me. Or Starfire, she might be an alien, but she's a girl, and she can help too. Cyborg is really worried about you , so he's here for you. We will always love you, Raven, no mater how dark times get. We're a Team!" Robin said, grinning and making a fist with his hand.  
"Thanks Robin… That's really nice of you…." Raven said, her expression grateful. "You like Starfire don't you?" she said.   
"Of course, why wouldn't I? She's a Titan-"  
"You know what I mean!" Raven laughed slightly, giving him a friendly prod.  
"C'mon, It's getting late!" He said, "Give me a lift?" Raven smirked and took his upper arms. They flew back to T-Tower.  
"Thanks for coming, looking for me. And thanks for keeping this private," She muttered.  
"That's what friends are for, huh? " He said, walking back to his room. Raven walked off to the Common room. BeastBoy, Cyborg and Starfire were there. The boys were playing a video game, and Starfire was looking bemused. She leaned against the door frame and watched the others silently.  
"I do not understand the concept of this device," Starfire was saying, indicating the Games Console on the floor.  
"It's for entertainment!" BeastBoy said, his tongue sticking out in concentration.  
"And it that another world on the Television?" Starfire asked, looking even more confused.  
"No, it- never mind Star, We'll tell you another day," Cyborg said. "Booya! High Score!" He pumped the air with his fist.  
"Awwww man!" BeastBoy said, throwing down the control pad. He sat back and folded his arms in a childish manner. In doing so, he saw Raven standing at the door.  
"Oh Hi Raven! Were did you go? We were looking all over for you!" He asked happily, while Cyborg was scaring the life out of Starfire with his Victory dance, with much pelvic thrust.  
"I just needed some time alone…" She replied.  
"Raven, if you have any more time alone, we wouldn't see ANY of you!" BeastBoy joked. Raven shook her head. So this was how it was gonna be… Just friends. She walked back to her room. A secret part of herself, barely even known by her, was glad that he was in a good mood again, that little green twerp…


	4. A Short Battle

-1Chapter 4:

"Titans! Go!" Robin yelled, he had received information of some one wrecking the west part of Jump City. The titans all ran out of T-Towers and into the T-car. Cyborg was driving, Robin in the passenger seat, Raven in the middle seat in the back, BeastBoy on her left and Starfire on her right. Cyborg drove like a madman towards the scene of the crime, which you couldn't miss. There was the bank, completely on fire and four guys were running out of it with haversacks filled with what was presumably money. The guys were wielding huge cannons and lasers. Cyborg skidded the car to a halt and they jumped out. Raven and Starfire took to the air, while Cyborg stood behind their getaway vehicle, Robin went for head on Combat. BeastBoy turned into a pterodactyl and flew towards them.

"Friends! Beware of their lasers!" Starfire squealed, throwing orbs at the bad guys from behind.

"How dare you shoot at Cyber?" A voice boomed, They turned to see a huge robot standing outside the bank. He had cannons and lasers strapped to his arms and shoulders.

"Sorry dude, that's MY look!" Cyborg yelled, jumping out from behind the truck, blasting at them whit his cannon. Cyber but his robotic arm out and the blast bounced off.

"If Cyborg's Cannon couldn't even dent him what chance have we got?" Raven breathed. Starfire looked angry.

"I will not let you harm my friends!" she was shouting, he turned to look at her.

"What will you do?" He snarled, aiming at Raven.

"I will harm you!" She shrieked. Cyber shot at Raven, but Starfire flew in front of her.

"Nooooooooo!" Robin bellowed, jumping on top of a car to jump in front of Starfire. Raven got there faster, she shoved Starfire out the way and yelled

"Aserath Metreos Zinthos!" A huge black force field appeared and the shot bounced off it. There was an explosion as it hit and Raven was thrown out on the sky and down onto a police car roof. BeastBoy, in Pterodactyl form rammed into the side of Cyber and they both flew into a heap on the ground. Raven scanned the area. Cyborg was dragging Cyber's cronies out of the van and taking the money back, Robin was checking to see if Starfire was okay, and BeastBoy was brawling with Cyber. Raven flew over to Cyber and saw something. On his back was a square panel…

"Guys! His Back!" she yelled. She put out her hands "Aserath Metreos Zinthos!" She yelled, just as Starfire has shot out her green orbs, robin had thrown a circular disk with bladed edges at him, before the shot hit, Raven grabbed BeastBoy by the neck and yanked him out of the way, they both tumbled into the gutter as Cyber exploded into a million pieces. Bits of shrapnel hit them all. Raven looked up, all her friends were okay. BeastBoy had changed back into himself.

"Hey, Rae you think you could get off of me?" His muffled voice came from beneath her. She blushed a little and stood up, he did too.

"Er… thanks for saving me," He said, going pink. Raven turned her back on him.

"Don't mention it. I was only returning the favour." She mumbled, walking over to the T-car. He followed her annoyingly.

"Oh, well that's okay, I mean I didn't wanna let you or Starfire or Robin get hurt, I just thought it would be best to-"

"BeastBoy, can like, not talk?" Raven asked, getting in the T-car.

"If you want. Wanna have a no talking contest?" He challenged.

"Yes." Raven said, not looking at him.

"Right, cool, first one to talk is a turkey!" BeastBoy said, staring at her, his lips pressed together. Cyborg, Robin and Starfire got back in the car.

"Well, Im glad that's over." Said Robin. Raven nodded. He glance at the back of the car and smiled at Starfire, who smiled back shyly.


	5. Angels singing

-1Last Prophets- Last Train home is not mine!

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Chapter 5: Raven's voice

They tramped back into T-tower, exhausted and dirty.

"Im gonna take a shower," Raven sighed, looking at her cut knee.

"Aha! You loose! You a turkey!" BeastBoy yelled, dancing around.

"Lose what?" Robin asked.

"The no talking contest!" BeastBoy replied. Robin knew instantly that Raven had only agreed to it to shut him up. He grinned at her. Raven shook her head and walked out of the room. She headed for the top floor shower. No one ever used it apart from her, so she didn't bother locking the door, only closing it. She turned the dial on the shower to hot and got undressed. She hung her cloak and other garments over the towel rail and stepped under the steamy water. She closed her eyes and let the warm water wash over her. She loved to shower, her hygiene was important to her, and she took pride in being clean, she also loved the privacy she had in the shower. No one ever came into even this corridor, so she was guaranteed not to be disturbed. She reached out for the shampoo and began to sing. She liked to sing, but she hated any one hearing her, as she was convinced she was rubbish and couldn't bear to be made fun of for something else. She massaged the foamy lavender scented shampoo into her scalp, lifting her voice higher.

"_but there's still tomorrow, forget the sorrow, I can't be on the last train home…." _ she sang as she rinsed her hair, glad that no one was here. No one except BeastBoy. He had been on his way to the roof to get something Robin had sent him for. He had wandered up that corridor, until he heard her. He had no clue it was Raven, he only heard a beautiful voice floating out from behind the door to the bathroom. He put his hand over his mouth to muffle his breathing and stood behind the door, listening intently. He could hear water, so whoever it was, was using the shower. He felt like knocking on the door, but that would mean the singer would stop… He felt it was too nice to interrupt so he kept listening. Raven was finished washing and was looking for a towel. He hand groped the rail, but her cloths fell down.

"Darn…" she muttered. BeastBoy frowned he knew THAT voice, it was Raven. The voice was her! He gasped in surprised, but he gave his game away. Raven stopped dead. She had heard the gasp and she called out

"Who's there?" She found the towel and wrapped it around herself. BeastBoy heard her walking to the door and in a panic, he transformed into a spider. He climbed up the wall and sat in a corner just as Raven popped her head out and looked up and down the corridor.

"I heard you gasp whoever you are. If I find out who you are, I WILL rip your head off!" She raged, carrying her cloths back to her room. BeastBoy waited until he heard he going into her room a floor down before crawling onto the floor and changing back into himself.

"Wow that was close, any closer and I could have been dead!" He thought, walking up the stairs to the roof. He glanced around. Robin's staff was propped up against a skylight. _Since when did Robin leave his staff up here?_ BeastBoy thought, lifting it and taking it back down stairs. He slowed down as he passed Raven's room. He wondered if she was singing again. He held his ear up to the door, but she wasn't he could only hear her chanting in meditation. He was very surprised at himself when he felt his stomach sink a little. He walked down the stairs and into the common room. He swore to himself never to tell anyone about Raven singing. He felt that if she wasn't singing in public then she must not want any one to know that she sang, so it would only be like a friend to keep her secret. He gave Robin his staff back.

"Robin, why did you leave it up there in the first place?" He asked, his eyebrow raised.

"Erm, I was training up there with it," He replied, taking it off BeastBoy and touching a button so that it shrank to the size of a pencil, before putting it back in his belt.

"Oh… that's.. cool." BeastBoy trailed off.

"Hey BB wanna another round?" Cyborg called over to him, brandishing the control pad of the games console.

"Do I ever?" BeastBoy answered, grinning and jumping over the back of the couch and plonking down beside Cyborg. Robin smiled slightly and went into the kitchen. Starfire was there, cutting up and apple.

"Hey Star," He said, opening the fridge.

"Hello friend Robin!" she replied, throwing her arms around him and hugging him close. . He blushed slightly, and hugged her back.


	6. Xmas eve

-1Chapter 6: Christmas eve

Raven awoke the one morning, weeks later, the sun shinning weakly on her bed. She looked at her alarm clock, it was eight a.m. She sat up and yawned, stretching her arms high above her head. There was a small knock on her door.

"What?" She yelled irritably. She thought it might be Starfire asking if Raven wanted any tinsel in her room again.

"Er, hi, sorry it's BeastBoy, can I come it?" He stammered. Raven looked down, she was wearing a nightdress, she yanked her bed cloths up to her neck.

"Yes," she yelled back. The little green guy came shuffling in and stood near her bed.

"Well, since it's only two days till Christmas…I came to ask if you wanna come Christmas shopping with us today. We're all going. The others said I shouldn't hassle you, but I just wanted to know-" He rambled. Raven frowned.

"Er, I think I'll pass." She grunted. He looked so disappointed that Raven almost felt sorry for him.

"Oh…," his ears drooped. "but, Raven, it won't be the same without you!" He whined.

"Why won't it be? I never really do anything interesting when we're out," She grumbled.

"But still! You need to do Christmas shopping too! Scrooge!" He said, sticking his tongue out at her mockingly.

"Fine! I'll go!" She snapped, throwing a cushion at him. He dodged the cushion and his face cracked into a smile.

"Yes! I knew you would!" He beamed at her.

"Now get out before I hit you with some thing heavier!" She retorted growling at him. He ran off out the door. She got out of bed and went to get dressed. What had she gotten herself into?

"Oh this is very fun, Friends!" Starfire was saying happily as they all stood in the mall, their arms laden with bags and boxes. Raven had gotten everyone a present apart from BeastBoy. She honestly didn't have a clue what to get him. Starfire was easiest, anything would have pleased her, so she bought her a charm bracelet with little bows and cute things that Starfire would be interested in. She bought Cyborg a new game for that stupid thing he played all day. She bought Robin a bottle of cologne (she didn't know what to get him either!). She bought all the titans that didn't hang out a T-tower a box of chocolates.

She was looking through shops and nothing that BeastBoy would like caught her eye. He didn't wear jewellery, he didn't wear cologne, he didn't shave, he and Cyborg shared games, she didn't have a clue what music he was into. Well, the only thing she could think of was that he was into drawing. She wandered off from the group and went into the artist's shop. She browsed the shelves, there were so many different colours of paint and pencils. In the end she saw a pack of artist's professional water colour pencils. They were expensive, but she got them anyway. She wondered vaguely why she was even buying him anything.

Back at T-towers, Raven was actually in a good mood. She had even be in a good enough mood to let Starfire put a Christmas Tree in her room. Only a Christmas tree though. They were all sitting in the common room, talking animatedly.

"Imagine dressing up as Santa to steal from shops?" BeastBoy said, referring to the most recent mission they had been on.

"Yeah that sucks…" Cyborg agreed, not taking his eyes off the screen of the T.V. Starfire had put on a CD she had bought, so the room was filled with We Wish You A Merry Christmas. Raven, Robin, Starfire and BeastBoy were busy writing Christmas Cards for their friends and family. Starfire had gotten a bit upset, as her family didn't celebrate Christmas, therefore she couldn't write them a card, so she wrote every one else's family one. She was also fascinated by licking the envelopes.

"Hey Raven, why do you only put the names in them instead of putting a message, or 'love' in them?" BeastBoy asked, peering over her shoulder.

"Hey! You aren't supposed to see until Christmas!" Raven said, slamming her hand over the card. "I can't be bothered. What's the point? It's only a piece of paper," She said, shoving him away.

"I just though since it's the festive season, you might try a little more…" He muttered, and went back to his cards.

"Well you thought wrongly," She said, poking him with her pen. He rubbed his side and blew a raspberry at her. She ignored him.

Then next day was spent, lazing around and writing out cards too. Starfire was bouncing around overjoyed that it was under 24 hours until Christmas. She was listening to Christmas songs again and this time she was singing along to them.

"Friend Raven! Would you like to come and sing along to the Christmas carols with me?" Starfire asked. She grabbed Raven's arm and yanked her up to her feet.

"No! Star- I don't want to!" She replied, angrily trying to get away.

"Why not? Is this activity not fun?" Starfire asked, looking hurt.

"No, well… For you it might be but I don't want to." Raven said, sitting back down. Starfire looked confused.

"Oh, em.. I'll sing alone, if you do not wish to join me," She said, smiling at Raven. Raven nodded.

"Your doing fine yourself anyway Star," She added, so not to make Starfire feel awkward.

BeastBoy was thinking. _Starfire is a very good singer, she sings with the right tone and pitch, but Raven's was really beautiful. Her singing enchanted me and made me wanna sing along…. _

"Right, I think it's time for bed. Whoever wakes up first, wake us all up!" Cyborg called, Every one nodded and went off to bed.


	7. Xmas Day cheer

-1Chapter 7: Christmas Day.

"Get up! Wake up! C'mon every one it's Christmas!" Robin's voice came from outside, by the sounds of it, he was the first one up. Raven climbed out of bed, quickly got changed and walked out her room. Suddenly, she go the wind knocked out of her by a green blur. She tumbled to the floor and sat up.

"Oh, sorry Raven!" BeastBoy said, helping her up. He grinned at her. "It's Christmas!" She would normally have shouted at him for this kind of collision in the hall, but she knew how excited he must be.

"It's okay, go enjoy yourself," She said.

"Oh no, you wormed your way out of thanksgiving, your coming to the common room too!" He said, grabbing her arm and running down the hall way. She just then noticed he was in his pyjamas. They were blue and had planets all over them. She laughed.

"What are you laughing at?" He asked.

"Your pyjamas!" She said. He pouted at her and pushed her into the common room.

"There's nothing wrong with my jammies!" Raven laughed. Robin sat on the floor with a pile of presents, as did Cyborg, and Starfire. Raven's pile was beside the couch near BeastBoy's. Raven walked over and sat down beside her pile. She took the nearest present and read the tag.

"To Raven from Starfire" Was just readable, but all around it was kisses. She had even pit some in the middle of the O in 'from'. Raven ripped the paper off and found a little box with a key. The box was all black and silver. Certainly nothing she had expected from Starfire. She had thought Starfire might have given her a kettle or a pair of oven gloves. Raven opened the box to see what it was like inside and Starfire, being Starfire had put something in it. Raven plucked out the bundle from the bottom of the box. It was a pair of flowery gloves.

"Thanks Star!" Raven called over to Starfire.

"You like my gifts to you Raven?" Starfire said, her eyes welling up with happiness.

"Yeah, thanks a lot," she replied.

"And I adore your gift to me. I have never seen anything so beautiful!" Starfire said, sniffing happily and waving the wrist that Raven's bracelet was on. Raven smiled to herself.

"There was no problem," She mumbled. Next present.

"To Raven, from Cyborg, Merry Xmas" It said. She tore off the paper. Inside was a long bottle. Raven read the bottle, it was perfume. She sprayed a little of it on to her wrist and sniffed it gingerly. It actually smelt really nice, so she sprayed some more of it on.

"Thanks Cyborg, the perfume is cool," She smiled. He grinned back. Im just opening your present right now- OH MY GOD! How did you know I had been wanting this game?" He gasped, his eyes widening at the case he held.

"Because you haven't stopped talking about it in weeks," She replied, picking up a present from Robin. She opened it and found herself looking at a shiny purple diary. It had a little elegant black and silver pen. Robin was sitting just across from her, near the tree.

"Hey Robin, thanks for the diary,"

"I know that you can't safely express your feelings, so maybe it would be better to write them down?" He replied, looking into her eyes meaningfully.

"Thanks for your concern and I'll do it," She gave him a nod to say she understood. There was only one present left from the titans, and it was from BeastBoy. The rest were all from the other titans that didn't live with them. She decided for some reason to leave that one until last. All the other titans had sent chocolates and sweets. Aqua lad had sent her some seashells. She reached for BeastBoy's gift. It was beautifully wrapped for BeastBoy. She took off the ribbon and tore away at the paper. It was a silver box. She unclipped it and opened the lid, inside was a thin silver chain with a silver raven on it. Raven gasped. It was amazing. The raven even had little rubies for red eyes and the wings were so detailed. She flipped it over and noticed in letters going down it's spine was _Raven. _Raven turned to BeastBoy, who hadn't opened his present from her yet.

"BeastBoy…" She croaked, lost for words. He looked fearful.

"Don't you like it? Im sorry, I have the receipt somewhere, you can change it if you want…" He mumbled, looking at the floor.

"No! No, I love it! It's amazing! It looks really expensive!" She said, feeling her eyes well up, luckily she had her hood up. BeastBoy's face lit up.

"Thanks. I was praying you'd like it, I didn't think you would." He said, relieved. Raven put the necklace on and smiled at BeastBoy. He smiled back and pulled out her present. Raven bit her lip as he tore the paper off eagerly.

"Wow! Raven!" He half yelled. He was looking at the box of pencils as if they were made of gold.

"I bought you them because I think your really good at drawing. And I saw your other pencils were getting kinda small." She said, she could feel herself getting red.

"You think my drawings are good? But, I never showed you any," BeastBoy said, his eyes wide.

"No, but I did see that one you drew of… Of Terra." Raven said. She remembered seeing one of Terra sitting on a wall. It had been on the table of BeastBoy's room when Raven had gone in to find him.

"Oh, oh yeah I remember that one. It's not my best, I'll show you more later!" BeastBoy said happily. Raven's eyes snapped open wide. She had expected him to sulk and get upset at the mention of her name. He was only interested in the pencils though, he had opened them and was examining them.

"Im almost scared to touch them they look so expensive!" He joked.

"Hey, Raven, thanks for the cologne, it's really nice!" Robin called over. Raven thought she saw BeastBoy's eyes narrowed for a moment, but, he wasn't he was only squinting in the light from the lamp.

"No problem!" Raven answered. Starfire came up behind Raven and put a Santa hat on her head over her hood.

"For Christmas- what is it called? Cheer!" She giggled. Raven went to pull it off, but every one jumped on her.

"Keep it on! We're all going to wear one and your not exempt!" Cyborg said, grinning in a mock evil scientist way.

"Okay, okay, I'll keep the darn thing on." Raven grumbled. The others clamoured off her. She noticed that she was the only one with cloths on. Robin was wearing plain grey sweat pants and a pyjama shirt, Starfire was wearing a long blue and pink nightdress, well Cyborg never wore cloths anyway, and BeastBoy with his space 'jammies'. She pointed this out to them and Robin, Starfire and BeastBoy went a little red and ran off to get changed. While they did that, Raven and Cyborg made plates of bacon, eggs and toast.

Later that day, Raven, Starfire and Cyborg were playing Darts with a dart board that Robin had bought for Cyborg. Well, Starfire and Cyborg were playing, Raven was keeping score and stopping Starfire from hurting anyone with sharp darts. BeastBoy was drawing some fruit in a bowl with his new pencils and Robin was talking to them all while eating chocolates that some one had bought him. Raven was having a really good time, she was laughing and joking with every one. Every now and then, out of the corner of her eyes she would catch a glimpse of BeastBoy gazing at her.

Suddenly, the door bell went just when they had all finished laughing at a joke Cyborg had told about David Hasselhoff.

"Carollers!" Shouted Robin,

"Last one to the door is a booger!" BeastBoy yelled. They all ran downstairs pell-mell and Robin got there first, opening the door, BeastBoy was last, much to Raven and Starfire's amusement, due to his colouration. A crew of people with Santa hats on and dark green shirts with DA emblazoned on them stood at the door. The girl at the front had long brown and purple hair.

"_We wish you a merry Christmas! We wish you a merry Christmas, We wish you a merry Christmas and a happy New year! Good tidings we bring, to you and your kin, we wish you a merry Christmas and a happy new year!" _they all sang.

"Have a lovely day!" the first girl said. "From all of us ay Devart!" And she walked away, with about twenty or more people in tow.

"Thank you!" Starfire squealed after them. The girl looked back and saluted. Robin shut the door.

"That was cool. I wonder who they all were…" He grinned, and they all went back to the common room.


	8. Xmas Night Surprise

-1Chapter 8: Christmas night

Everyone was in the kitchen helping out with the Christmas dinner. BeastBoy and Starfire were preparing salad, starters and the Table, Raven was cooking chicken with Cyborg and Robin was doing side bits and pieces. When the dinner was finally ready, every one was digging in. Between the pudding and the main course, Starfire handed out Christmas crackers. Raven pulled one with Starfire and then pulled another with BeastBoy. She won with Beast boy. The prize was a little plastic green frog that if you pressed it's bottom down and let got, if jumped.

"It looks like you" Raven joked to BeastBoy. Starfire had won a paper crown and a pencil sharpener, which she graciously gave to beast boy in exchange for a bouncy ball, she wouldn't give away the crown though. Every one was chatting away and being generally happy. When the three boys had started talking about arcades, Starfire turned to Raven.

"Raven, I have something more for you," She said, handing her a box. It was made of shiny card. Raven opened it, inside was a little silver bracelet with half a heart on it. I said Be Fri on it.

"What's this? And what does Be Fri mean?" Raven asked curiously.

"I have one too!" Starfire showed her wrist, a bracelet like Raven's dangling on it, beside the one that Raven bought her. It said St Ends on it. "Put them together," Starfire said. Raven put the two halves together to see that they said 'Best Friends' when put together.

"You really consider me as your best friend?" Raven asked.

"Of course! Friend Raven, you are truly a wonderful person! You can be sad at times, but Im sure there's a reason. You have fought alongside me and aided me in times of need!" She said, hugging Raven fiercely. Raven hugged Starfire back.

"Thanks Star… I really appreciate this." Raven replied, feeling tears in her eyes. They broke apart.

"why give me this now instead of earlier?" She asked.

"I felt it would be more special if I gave you it separately." Starfire explained. Raven smiled.

"It will always be special to me, just because you gave me it," She put it on her wrist and smiled again.

"Thank you friend Raven! I feel like such a good friend now!" Starfire said, beaming at her.

Every one was back in the common room after dinner, bidding a merry Christmas before going to their rooms. Hugging, and giving pecks on the cheek.

"Im glad you really enjoyed yourself tonight… I thought that you'd stay in your room, we all enjoyed your company Raven…" Robin announced, when they were finished.

"Yeah, I did. Don't expect this every night though!" She said coyly, ginning. They all laughed and went off to their rooms. Raven made to her room, but when she heard all the doors slamming, she ran in the direction of the roof of T-Tower. She walked along the roof and sat at the edge, staring up at the sky and thinking of how happy she was. She was so happy that she began to sing. She sang a GooGooDolls song called Iris, even though she didn't really like the GooGooDolls that much, she loved that song.

"_And I'd give up forever to touch you… Coz I know that you feel me so now … you're the closest to heaven I'll ever be and I don't wanna go home right now…"_ She lifted her voice up to the stars, singing as loud as she could. She took a deep breath to start singing the chorus.

"_And I don't want the world to save me! Coz I don't think that they'd understand! When everything's meant to be broken, I just want you to know who I am!" _She stopped suddenly and heard another voice singing that song.

"_And you can't fight the tears that aint coming… Or the moment of truth in your life, When everything feels like the movies… And you bleed just to know your alive!"_

Raven gasped and turned around. There was BeastBoy, sitting at the other side of T-tower, smiling at her and gazing into her eyes. It was clear he had been singing with her. He stood up and walked towards her, singing the chorus again. "_And I don't want the world to save me! Coz I don't think that they'd understand! When everything's meant to be broken, I just want you to know who I am!" _

"BeastBoy!" Raven said, tears in her eyes. She stood up went remarkably red.

"Raven?" He said, smiling.

"What are you doing up here?" She breathed.

"Listening to you sing," He said simply.

"I know, it's awful, I'll stop," She said, casting her eyes to the floor.

"No it's not! Raven, is this why you don't sing?" He asked, agog.

"Well yeah. I don't like it when people listen, Im scared encase they think it's rubbish," She said, not looking at him. He put it finger tips under her chin and gently tipped her face towards him.

"Well it's not. I think it's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. I heard you when you were in the shower a few weeks ago. I thought, honestly that there was angels in there." He said, looking up into her eyes for she was a good few inches taller than him.

"Thanks BeastBoy…" She said, her eyes stinging with tears.

"Your welcome, I only speak the truth. Well for once…" He joked. Raven laughed, but then she cried. BeastBoy looked alarmed.

"What's the matter?" He asked, in shock. Tears flowed freely down Raven's face.

"I'm just so happy! You guys let me join in with Christmas, Join in with your games and everything, after all the time I spent shouting and moping at you all. I love you guys," She sobbed.

"Look, can I ask you something?" BeastBoy asked, looking vaguely scared for his life.

"Go ahead." She said, wiping away her tears with her cloak.

"Why were you locking yourself away in your room for ages?"

"Well, I knew I'd have to tell you one day or another… It all started with Terra. BeastBoy, I loved you. I really did. More than I could ever possibly say."

"Oh Raven, Im so sorry…" BeastBoy whispered.

"Don't be. I deserved it for being so jealous. I just wanted so badly to tell you how I felt, but I loved you so much that I just wanted to make you happy… and I saw you were happy with Terra, so I didn't tell you. I knew you didn't like me anyway… It wasn't as if you hid your crushes." Raven smirked at this part, remembering how he had been madly in love with Terra. "And you sobbed over her death, and I began to realise that you would never sob over my body the way you did with her. I just got too upset to be around my friends. I feared for your lives. I knew if my emotions got the better of me, I'd kill some one by accident. That's why I locked myself away."

"Raven, I want you to know that before Terra existed in my world, you were the one I had the biggest crush on. I annoyed you because I was immature. I liked to see you get really steamed at me and chase me around. I couldn't think of any other way to get you attention, so that's the way I done it. I thought that you would realise because your really smart! When you didn't react, I thought you just treated me like a little annoying brat, so I gave up. When Terra paid attention to me, I just gave up on you completely. I thought she was the one for me, but it turned out I was wrong. I wondered why you hated her so much, and I did think that was why, but I pushed it out of my mind when you were mad at me too. Now I realise you were mad because I didn't return your love." BeastBoy explained. Tears kept rolling down Raven's face.

"I didn't realise…. I knew Terra was a lot prettier than me, but I didn't know…" Raven said breathlessly.

"I'm going to tell you the truth Raven, but first want to show you this…" He pulled out three pictures. He gave two of the to her. The first was one he mad drawn today, when she was keeping score for the darts game. That had been why he had been glancing at her. It was so beautifully drawn. The second was one she didn't recognise. It was her again, but this time it wasn't as good as the first, but a close second. It was a picture of her flying in the starry sky, with a solitary raven at her side.

"When did you draw this one?" She asked, tearing her eyes from the page.

"When we first started the Titans. I have loads. I was too afraid to show you my drawings back then," He said. "And look," He handed Raven the next page. It was the picture of Terra on the wall. Raven's tears got thicker as she read the title. _My Terra_ That's all Raven had ever wanted to be. BeastBoy's Raven. He took the drawing back from her.

"Watch this," He tore the picture up into thousands of pieces and threw them into the night. Raven watched as the breeze made the flutter away.

"This is the truth Raven. I love you. I think you're the most beautiful, amazing girl in the world. I'd rather spend a minute with you than an eternity with Terra. Sure she was pretty, but she had no inner beauty. You are beautiful and mysterious both on the inside and the outside. I love you and nothing can change that…" he said, wiping away Raven's tears with his gloved hand. Raven fell into his arms and hugged him closely.

"I love you too BeastBoy," She murmured into his ear… As they stood on the top of T-tower, the first flakes of snow fell around them.


End file.
